Hayfever or Cancer?

Another story about me being a dick.

I have a very short fuse with the general public on the whole. I can be a grumpy bastard sometimes. Only last night on the tube home an old and posh (bad bad mix) lady started muttering to herself because I was sniffing. I have nasty hayfever right now and I had no tissues. I didn't particularly enjoy sniffing but she seemed to think I was doing it to piss her off. Her muttering got louder and louder until I turned to her and asked her if she had a problem (I was very polite). She looked straight down the end of her nose at me through her half moon glasses and told me that it was incredibly bad manners to sniff. She said all this in a voice loud enough for the whole carriage to hear. I calmly and politely told her that I was very sorry (again in a voice loud enough for everyone to hear) that I didn't have a handkerchief. She angrily told me that I should make sure I had a handkerchief with me at all times if I suffered from hayfever. I told her ( and the whole carriage ) that I had never suffered from hayfever and the sniffing was in fact a side effect from the chemotherapy I had been receiving. You should have seen her face, unbelievable, her jaw dropped and her mouth was trying to speak but no noise was coming out. If I could turn on tears at a whim I would have cried to make her shame all the greater. As it was she looked horrified at her rash outburst and to tell the truth I felt a little bad but the whole carriage went deathly silent. She apologised in a very quiet voice, I replied (In a loud voice) that I hadn't heard what she said and made her apologise in a voice loud enough for the now horrified carriage to hear as well.

I am such a cunt sometimes and I can honestly say that I feel ashamed for saying that. Fucking awesome at the time though, I am just glad there wasn't a doctor in the carriage who would say "Actually, a runny nose has nothing to do with chemotherapy"

Fuck that though, I went out today and bought a new MP3 player so the guilt didn't last too long.