Poker: The new cunt magnet

I had the intense displeasure to meet a professional poker player last night. What a massive cunt.

I can't remember meeting anyone so impressed with his own shadow in quite some time. He looked genuinely surprised when I told him what I thought about pro gamblers and I've known a few. His main argument in his defence hinged almost completely on the fact that he could afford the finer things in life and was only 23 years old. I found it rather funny when he asked his girlfriend if he could borrow £20 for a cab home and let him know that in no uncertain terms.

I think I can safely say that he was the first Swedish person that I have ever met who I didn't warm to. Swiftly followed by his girlfriend who told me several times that she was the best poker dealer in London. At the tender age of 22.

This was perhaps the first time in my life that I had a little bit of hindsight as to how I must have seemed to others at her age. I wasn't that much of a cunt was I? Surely not...

I did mention that old croupier joke to this "best poker dealer in London" girl that asks the difference between a card dealer and a gynaecologist? A gynaecologist only has to deal with one cunt at a time. I had to explain it to her three times. They do say that the key to all humour is timing and having to backtrack and explain an off the cuff joke like that killed the momentum somewhat. She mentioned how she found the word cunt distasteful and didn't like how frequently I used it which I found slightly amusing as it was her innate cunty demeanour that demanded I explain a simple joke again and again. How many other four letter and one syllable words could perfectly encapsulate a cunt other than cunt? She then drew out the age old and completely spurious argument that those who swore to excess were just exposing their own lack of vocabulary. To prove her wrong in the fullest sense I spoke in hugely belligerent multi syllabic terms for the next 5 minutes with the odd cunt thrown in for good measure. I always find that to be a most satisfying way to communicate. Juxtaposition being everything.